Your eyes show the strength of your soul ...

[twelve_not_fourteen]

What might surprise a person about the carbonite freezing process - since most people never get the pleasure of the experience - is the way you feel it freezing you on the inside at the same time as it's freezing your outsides. Even holding your breath, it enters your lungs fast. Harding everything you need to breathe. And the cold is so deep that it feels like every nerve is on fire.

If he'd had more than an instant, Han would have probably supposed that drowning feels like this, with less agony. All he really got to think about was the fact that this was going to be the end of him; while his friends were still in trouble ...

He could have lived with his early death if he knew that Chewie and Luke and, especially Leia, were gonna be okay. The best he could do was keep a brave face.

When Han Solo's body was extracted from the freezing chamber, it was clear that he had suffered. It had been quick. There were longer ways to hurt a guy, for sure, but the look on his face was impossible to escape. His hand held up in a pathetic defense from the gas. People were going to see that look on him forever.

~~~~~

All the scanning equipment showed that the smuggler was not dead.

The stormtroopers, many of them, were impressed by that fact because they were by far the most impassionate of all the people on the platform. The didn't hate the man the way his enemies did. Or loved him the way that his friends did.

Their boots pounded in an odd cascade against the catwalks of Besbin's mining facility. Helping a famous bounty hunter load up his prize into the old Firespray model ship.

Comments

[thecanarylives]

They settle into a comfortable kind of quiet as she pilots them out of the planet's atmosphere and jumps them into light speed. Her gaze flits to the radar every few moments to make sure they're not being followed, because the moment someone discovers what's left of Jabba's palace, there'll be a bounty on her own head faster than the man beside her can make the Kessel run.

She glances over at him when he speaks, shrugging off the sentiment and punching in coordinates for the base Skywalker and the Princess were last holed up in.

"You're welcome," is all she says, checking the radar again before settling back in her seat.

[twelve_not_fourteen]

There's so much going on that Han isn't aware of for one reason or another. Right now? He is literally and metaphorically in the dark - which is something that would really bother him in most other circumstance, but he's still processing everything.

Really, he wishes he could see the look on her face, in that moment. (He always was better at reading the faces of people at the sabacc tables than most.) Han has no idea what to make of her short reply. Other than she probably doesn't want to talk about this.

He leans back in the seat and closes his eyes. Figuring that if she doesn't want to talk then he may as well sleep. Strange that he can feel the lids pulling closed and yet, be in just as much darkness as he was an instant ago ...

[thecanarylives]

She's never been much of a talker in any situation, and right now is no exception. She'd known the consequences of coming to get Han without the rebels officially behind her. Known that she wouldn't be able to stick around when she got him to safety - that she'd take the heat if it meant getting him the hell out of that place.

She'd stay on base long enough to make sure he'd make a full recovery. After that... well, she's sure the princess will take care of him well enough.

She casts a glance back at him, watching him settle back into his seat and close his eyes.

"There's a cot in the back," she murmurs, flipping on the radar to alert her of any ships in their vicinity. "You'll be with your friends by the time you wake up."

[twelve_not_fourteen]

"My friends ..."

Han listens to the words hang out in the relative quiet of the cockpit. His friends that he would have died to protect were nowhere to be found right now, were they? He thought at least Chewbacca would have tried to help him, but then again ... he did tell him to watch over the princess.

"You seem in an awful hurry to get me back to them." He murmurs, eyes still closed. "Like you want to leave. Did ... somebody pay you to get me? Is there someone that wants me more than Jabba?"

He can't imagine there was, but he's been out of it for a while. A lot can change when a man is frozen in carbonite.

[thecanarylives]

She stops as he starts to muse, frowning and glancing over at him from her chair. Sure, maybe it wouldn't be surprising if she'd merely picked up a bounty on him and rescued him for the cash. He had no way of knowing that no bounty hunter in the galaxy was so desperate for cash that they'd steal a prize like that from Jabba the Hutt - or maybe he should.

"I don't want to leave," she says quietly. "And nobody's stupid enough to put another bounty on your head. Just... figured you'd want to get back to them, that's all."

[twelve_not_fourteen]

He had no way of knowing just about anything right now. Which is a lousy situation to be in and he hates feeling so out of touch - but it beats being frozen in carbonite. Just about anything does.

"I don't know." He says with a shrug. Then he opens those eyes that don't seem to be focused on anything. "I ain't the type that's ever had a lot of friends."

There's the thought that perhaps his friends aren't as loyal to him as he thought they were. He's also, very obviously, misinterpreted the fondness Sara has for him. "Whatever the case, I don't want you to just dump me somewhere and take off, unless you gotta."

[thecanarylives]

"Trust me. You're doing alright with the friends you do have." The smile she gives him is a little wry, maybe a touch sad. He's lucky, really. To have people as loyal to him as he does. Not to mention the fact that one of them's an honest to God princess with resources beyond just about anyone in the rebellion.

She furrows a brow when he speaks again, surprised at his ability to pinpoint exactly the plan she's been formulating in her head a few moments ago.

"I'm not 'dumping you somewhere'," she shrugs, shifting to face him a bit. "Chewie, Skywalker, and the Princess have been putting together a tactical mission to get you out for weeks. Hell, even Lando's chipping in. And with all the medical tech they've got access to, you'll be back to your old self in no time."

She glances at the ground.

"You'll be in good hands, Han."

[twelve_not_fourteen]

He thinks he has good friends. You have to admit, though, it is a little disconcerting to have none of them there for your rescue. That's why Han is so perplexed by the situation. Besides Sara being involved in the operation at all ...

"I can't let you just leave."

He probably couldn't stop her, honestly. Not before being frozen and not right now, while he's still trying to kick the effects of hibernation sickness. Yet, there's something about the tone of the words that suggests that he thinks he could make difficult.

"Not without knowing why you risked you neck for me. Why you came after me on your own ..."

[thecanarylives]

The corner of Sara's lip tugs upwards a bit at that, and she leans a shoulder against the back of her seat, considering him a moment.

"You say that like you have a say in the matter."

Still, it's probably the first time in years anyone has genuinely cared about where she was or what she did that didn't pertain to a mission. She chews on her lip, shrugging her free shoulder.

"They were taking too long. Didn't like the idea of you sitting in a carbon block somewhere, just... waiting for them to get organized."

[twelve_not_fourteen]

He seems to be looking at her. His face pointed toward her as if he could still stare instead into her eyes, but his own aren't meeting hers like they should. He can't see, but yet ... he doesn't look sad or helpless.

"I didn't think you cared so much."

Which makes him examine how much he cares for her. It was never a matter of not being fond of Sara, but he kinda presumed her interest in him was meant to be a brief one and that it had passed. In the meantime, he had been swept up in the wake of keeping Luke and Leia out of trouble. Which was a hell of a job because they hadn't developed a well defined sense of self preservation the way Han had.

[thecanarylives]

Even though he can't see her, it's hard for her to meet his gaze. When she does manage it, she puts on a smile, shrugging a shoulder again.

"About you being frozen in carbonite? Even I'm not that heartless."

She shifts a little in her chair, considering him a moment before getting to her feet. Reaching out a hand to tap his, she takes hold of it and tugs him out of the cockpit and towards the cot in the back of the ship.

"C'mon. You should lie down, at least. I've got some food - it's not great, but it'll tide you over until we get there."

[twelve_not_fourteen]

Han seems to shift easily enough out of the chair and on to his feet. His balance and that natural swagger coming back to him. "We don't need to ..."

... leave the cockpit, but he doesn't finish the thought. It's not as if being at the controls of a starship is an uncomfortable place for a man who considers himself - above all things - a pilot.

"I'm fine, sweetheart." He murmurs. The tone suggests, very faintly, that he might be trying to convince himself of that. It also suggests that he doesn't really mind her doting over him that much. "I just need a little time to shake this and I'll be good as ever."

[thecanarylives]

"Sleep'll help," she murmurs, helping him through the narrow hallway and towards the cot in the back. It's small - not exactly built for a man his height, but she supposes he's used to that by now. Helping him in, tucking a pillow under his head, she crouches next to him, pushing back his hair.

"You should try and get some sleep."

[twelve_not_fourteen]

Han isn't going to argue. He's feeling better than he did when he was broken out of Jabba's, sure, but it's not like he's feeling great. Laying down seems like a nice idea all things considered and besides, it's nice to be looked after by someone.

"How long is our jump, sweetheart?" His head settles down on the pillows, while his eyes appear to be looking through her ... instead of at her. "Because I've spent a lot of time alone over the last few ... weeks, I guess ... not keen to be alone right now."

[thecanarylives]

"Should be there in a few hours," she murmurs, fingertips stroking through the short crop of hair behind his ear. The corner of her lip tugs upwards a bit at his words and she shifts, climbing into the cot next to him.

"Scooch," she mutters, and even if there's not a huge amount of room, she manages to fit in flush up against him.

[twelve_not_fourteen]

"Oh good."

There's a faint smile that touches his lips when she doesn't hesitate to join him. She doesn't hesitate to press right up on him, either, which is extra nice. A little worse for wear, a little smelly, a little dirty and she still doesn't hesitate to squeeze herself in beside him.

"Looks like we got just the right amount of space for us."

[thecanarylives]

She knows that smile. The genuine one. The kind he doesn't have to put on - it's natural and easy and sweet. She curls in a little closer, stroking his hair back and watching him curiously a moment.

"Yeah. Looks like it."

She considers him a moment, leaning up to brush her lips lightly against his.

[twelve_not_fourteen]

It's a bit of a challenge for some people to discern Han's true smiles from the fake ones, because a lot of people never see the genuine ones. That said, when you've seen both, the difference is very clear. There's often a sneer in the eyes if not the lips. As if he can't completely contain the sarcasm that wants to ebb out of him.

But Sara has correctly identified this one as 'real' and the affection is plain to see. When it comes to the kiss? He can feel her moving in, the slight puffs of air from her nose teasing his face, so his first blind kiss doesn't catch him off guard all that much. He eases into the gesture and takes his time in it. The Corellian has always been an above average kisser.

He sighs, contented or perhaps relieved, in the kiss.