![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
No matter how good you are at something, if you challenge yourself against enough people, you'll find someone who can best you. Even if you have all the talent in the galaxy, nobody is going to be successful one-hundred percent of the time. It's an unfortunate aspect of life that we fail.
You can label those thoughts as pessimism or realism if you like, but it doesn't change it's truth. And the good thing is that, in recognizing you can't be the best at everything all the time, you can come to realize that the whole rest of the human race is on that ship with you. What ends up making the difference is striving to be better and being well rounded in what you can do. There's no shortage of aspiration in Han. He's not the 'resting on his laurels' type.
Which brings us to the explanation of why he's been spending the last few nights in Nexus bars learning to play darts of all things. Boy meets girl. Boy likes girl. Boy mentions being interested in bar games. Girl says darts seem like fun. Boy spends all his spare time over the next few days learning how to play darts, naturally.
It could have been fun to learn how to play together and, no doubt, that's the route a lot of people would take. Not Han, though. It's so deeply ingrained into him that he needs to prove his worth, that he couldn't very well go into this occasion without some practice. Even though it's just for fun. Just an excuse to get closer to somebody. He has to be the best that he can be in the few short days he has to learn the skill. Besides, he rationalizes to himself, it will be good if someone knows the rules to the games before they try to play.
Thock. Thock. Thock.
The sound of the metal tipped darts pelting the sisal fibre board is the same every time. In some ways, the game likens itself to other kinds of marksmanship. A lot of the work is done in adopting a good stance each time and being consistent.
The hours melt away faster that he realizes.
Unlike playing cards, which requires observation and thinking to play well, he can mostly zone out here. For him, it's kind of relaxing. He's not a champion dart player after two days and he's pretty sure Barton would handily outclass him in a game, but he's gotten pretty good. He tends to hit in the wedge that he's aiming for more often than he misses.
Although they never specifically agreed upon a time or even a specific place to reunite, he trusts the May Queen to find him. The morning was clear and no doubt a goddess has a lot to accomplish in a day, so he waits until the sky begins to turn dark before he heads to an establishment called 'The Pitch and Roll'.
It starts to rain just before he gets there, but it's one of those warm refreshing ones that you tend not to mind getting caught in too much. For now. It looks to him like it's going to really start pouring soon. A good evening to spend inside somewhere. He's glad he brought a good jacket; it's light brown in color and leather. If it's still raining when it's time to walk to the Falcon, he'll be glad to have it. The rest of what he's put on in terms of his clothing is the standard for him - black pants with a yellow decoration along the side seam and a white long sleave shirt.
He doesn't see Frea when he arrives and so, he'll walk up to the bar and order an ale for himself while he waits.
You can label those thoughts as pessimism or realism if you like, but it doesn't change it's truth. And the good thing is that, in recognizing you can't be the best at everything all the time, you can come to realize that the whole rest of the human race is on that ship with you. What ends up making the difference is striving to be better and being well rounded in what you can do. There's no shortage of aspiration in Han. He's not the 'resting on his laurels' type.
Which brings us to the explanation of why he's been spending the last few nights in Nexus bars learning to play darts of all things. Boy meets girl. Boy likes girl. Boy mentions being interested in bar games. Girl says darts seem like fun. Boy spends all his spare time over the next few days learning how to play darts, naturally.
It could have been fun to learn how to play together and, no doubt, that's the route a lot of people would take. Not Han, though. It's so deeply ingrained into him that he needs to prove his worth, that he couldn't very well go into this occasion without some practice. Even though it's just for fun. Just an excuse to get closer to somebody. He has to be the best that he can be in the few short days he has to learn the skill. Besides, he rationalizes to himself, it will be good if someone knows the rules to the games before they try to play.
Thock. Thock. Thock.
The sound of the metal tipped darts pelting the sisal fibre board is the same every time. In some ways, the game likens itself to other kinds of marksmanship. A lot of the work is done in adopting a good stance each time and being consistent.
The hours melt away faster that he realizes.
Unlike playing cards, which requires observation and thinking to play well, he can mostly zone out here. For him, it's kind of relaxing. He's not a champion dart player after two days and he's pretty sure Barton would handily outclass him in a game, but he's gotten pretty good. He tends to hit in the wedge that he's aiming for more often than he misses.
Although they never specifically agreed upon a time or even a specific place to reunite, he trusts the May Queen to find him. The morning was clear and no doubt a goddess has a lot to accomplish in a day, so he waits until the sky begins to turn dark before he heads to an establishment called 'The Pitch and Roll'.
It starts to rain just before he gets there, but it's one of those warm refreshing ones that you tend not to mind getting caught in too much. For now. It looks to him like it's going to really start pouring soon. A good evening to spend inside somewhere. He's glad he brought a good jacket; it's light brown in color and leather. If it's still raining when it's time to walk to the Falcon, he'll be glad to have it. The rest of what he's put on in terms of his clothing is the standard for him - black pants with a yellow decoration along the side seam and a white long sleave shirt.
He doesn't see Frea when he arrives and so, he'll walk up to the bar and order an ale for himself while he waits.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-08 02:53 pm (UTC)She gets to have another laugh. It's a light, pretty laugh that sparkles like sunlight when it hits a clear lake. It's a laugh he never minds hearing and it generally has a positive effect on his good humor. He's even smiling slightly when she gets to telling him the 'secret'.
In mock surprise, he looks down at the two of them, as if to confirm that 'yes they are naked'. Then he waggles his hips slightly, which, considering how nicely they've been lined up together, has his part rubbing against hers in a way that feels awfully nice. It's actually something of difficult challenge to not take it any further right then and there.
"Mmmm. Your right." He murmurs in that deep and sweet tone that his voice sometimes adopts. "Anyone this close and this naked around the divine power and beauty of Lady Frea can't help, but succumb to their natural instincts."
And with that, he kisses her deeply and arches in the way that he needs to. The penetration is nice and slow because that's what he wants. Every inch to be felt by both of them. The two of them shall do as males and females in nature have instinct to do.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-08 08:42 pm (UTC)He is so good at making her feel good.
"Please do," she whispers as his lips descend on hers. Slow and steady, they say, wins the race; right now, it's winning him more of her moans, half muffled against his lips and thrumming in her chest. Her arms close around him to hold him close, hands splayed across his back. She'll try not to scratch him (much).
When he's finally filling her she lets out a breath and arches up against him. Right now, it seems proper to have every part of them as close together as possible. Their lips meet and part and meet again in a counter-rhythm to the one he's setting with his hips. She's not particularly musical, but percussion she could probably handle, given how easily she picks up his beat and how readily her hips will move to it.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 02:23 am (UTC)They must have been meant to make good music together and honestly, this feels like a song that Han might never get tired of. He could practice for hours and be a very happy, if a bit tired, man. If her body be an instrument than he should like to become a master player. He, in turn, would not hesitate to give her numerous opportunities to play with him.
They also happen to have consistency together, at least as far as Han can tell. This coupling goes as well and as long as most of the others. This one just happened to be in his place, which doesn't actually make him as comfortable as you might think. Yes, it's his turf. And their heap of mattresses and nest of blankets are perfectly comfortable to him, but ...
He doesn't really indulge in these pleasures on his ship. Can't say it's never happened, but it's rare. She finds little and big ways to be exceptional to him, which is amazing, but also a bit scary.
And he does sort of like the way their sounds reverberate through his Millenium Falcon and mesh with the faint cadence of the rain.
After what feels like a good lengthy expression of intimacy between them, Han finishes. He doesn't try to hold back the transition meant to take place, since it hasn't been an issue before. And with Frea he has the added benefit of not only satisfying physical needs with the act, but ... certain emotional ones as well.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 03:38 am (UTC)Whether they were 'meant' for it or not, this is their song now, and it's her favorite. It's already perfect and yet she, too, craves the chance to practice with him over and over again. Like with jazz, there are so many possible variations on the theme. It will be exhausting, but good art comes only at a price.
Frea has no complaints when he finishes. Quite the contrary. She's had her fun and is in the lovely spot between contentment and overstimulation: everything's hazy and glowing and glorious. Feeling his completion so soon after her own makes her purr like the cat who got the, well. There's no rush, but when he's done she draws him down to lay with her. On top of her, if he wants, or beside; wherever he ends up she'll be tucking herself against him.
"Wonderful," she breathes against his skin once they're settled. "Thank you."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 02:27 pm (UTC)"It was." He says with a bit of that roguish smile touching his lips. "I don't see why you'd want to thank me, though." There have got to be so many people out there that compare to what he can offer her that if anyone of them should be thanking the other ... it should be him thanking her. "I like to think we both get something out of it."
He grabs one blanket that he can reach that isn't wedged underneath both of them to draw up around them. He's decided that curling up against her side is exactly where he wants to be.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 04:58 pm (UTC)She loves that smile. Right then is when the realization hits her. It's a lovely feeling, knowing love like that. Fingertips trace lightly over his smile, yes, even while he's talking. She just can't get enough of it right now. "Oh, definitely. But you were the one doing most of the work this time. And I'd hate for you to think I'm inconsiderate."
Him curled up at her side? Yes, please! Frea stretches an arm out so he can use her as a pillow, and once he's settled she arranges herself around him. She nuzzles into his hair with a contented sigh once they're settled and the blanket's wrapped around them. "Cozy?"
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 05:34 pm (UTC)"I think you're fine." As opposed to inconsiderate, was the intention of his words. He does also think she's good looking. Of good quality. Any interpretation of the way those words are assembled would probably fit. He still feels so damn good that his head is fuzzy. She won't find him spouting off his slickest lines right after sex, generally speaking.
To her question of coziness, his reply is a soft murmur of ascent. With them so wrapped together at the moment, she can probably feel it coming from his vocal cords as much as she hears the answer. "Are you?"
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 07:31 pm (UTC)"So're you." Considerate, handsome, worthy, deserving. All of it, punctuated with a kiss to a spot on his forehead straddling his hairline.
"Mm-hmm." He gets a little squeeze of thanks; asking was nice. "Lovely and warm."
Warm is important. So are secrets. Not for the having but for the knowing. So... "Tell me a secret?"
no subject
Date: 2016-08-09 08:16 pm (UTC)The hand attached to the arm that keeps her close strokes over the soft of her skin. Han's combing through his memories for anything that he can think of to tell her about himself that won't kill the mood.
"I've never cut my hair short. Not by my own decision." He says finally. Han is taking his time in the telling of it. It's not a complicated story, it's just that his mind is just moving slowly. "For a few years I was in the military and I just had to do what they told me."
"But anyway, even when I was going to desert planets and I'd think. Man, I bet it would be nice to cut some of this. I still didn't. And I think it was because of this Wookiee, she looked out for me, for a lot of years ..."
"She always told me I looked good scruffy."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 01:07 am (UTC)When he starts to speak her attention returns fully to him; the fingers that had been idly stroking his back now start to move in patterns meant to soothe. The idea of his having been in the military gets a little rumble of a giggle from her. As close together as they are, he can hear that and feel it both.
"You do. I like your hair this way." To prove it, she gives his hair another nuzzling. "Hmm, my turn. I guess... I should admit, I've never done this indoors before. This is a first."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 01:48 am (UTC)Captain Solo melts into Frea's touches. It somehow seems to make it easier to talk about Dewlanna as she does. It's among the only times he's ever spoken about her and not felt a lump well up in his throat.
"First time doing the unspeakable inside, huh? I think most of my type prefers it this way."
While it's on his mind, he has a question to ask. One he sees as simple but important.
"Hey darling, I've been meaning to ask how old you are."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 02:01 am (UTC)But the giggle is not, is never, at his expense. She hopes he'll come to understand, to truly believe, that anything she takes is given back and then some. When he makes her laugh, she wants to make him laugh too. Every kiss is returned with interest. Anything he gives her, she wants to share.
It's good to be able to talk about the people loved and missed without revisiting the grief. Remembering shouldn't lead to reliving. She doesn't know, but she'd be pleased to help if she did.
"Yeah, but it has its charms. It's very soft." And mattresses are a little bouncier than the ground. It's something she might experiment with later.
"Hmm?" Total stalling tactic, that sound. "As old as my tongue, and a little older than my teeth. Why?"
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 12:24 pm (UTC)"I didn't." Solo confirms, leaning in to press a kiss on her cheek. "Probably has a lot to do with why it didn't last."
When it comes to being out in nature versus being indoors for matters of intimacy, his preference is still inside. Although, he must admit that Frea aways seems to find places that are far more comfortable than he'd expect them to be.
His question. Han thinks he could frame it in such a way that she'd feel guilty if she didn't answer and Han does want to know badly enough that he'd considered a couple of ways to ask about the information. However, now that they're talking about it and he can see she doesn't want to just tell him the way she often does with his other questions, it makes him want to back down.
He knows how he feels about certain things she might want to ask that he wouldn't want to talk about.
"I guess I just want to know you better." He says with a shrug. "The same reason you might find the fact that I don't cut my hair short interesting. We don't have to talk about it, though."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 07:09 pm (UTC)He could guilt her into telling him things, yeah. And then she'd not want to see him as much. Not a good trade, she doesn't think--and hopes he would agree. But as it is, this isn't a refusal to answer so much as an inability. His answer to the rebuttal makes her hesitate and think.
After three breaths, she quietly admits, "I don't know."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 08:21 pm (UTC)"More of a pilot than a soldier." He says without thinking. Then when he does start thinking about it, he has to wonder if the distinction matters all that much to her. "I flew in a one person starship, usually against other people in one man starships."
They killed each other just as dead as the troopers, though, in the end and the idea of him doing anything that makes her not want to be around him as much would be something he would consider an awful trade. He hopes he never ends up in that kind of exchange with her.
"It's not that important." He soothes. Not so much that it's worth stressing her out. Absolutely not worth rubbing her the wrong way over it. Han rubs the back of his hand (it's less rough than the palm) along the line of her jaw gently. "I'm about to be twenty-eight, I think."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 10:27 pm (UTC)"Oh." He's right that she doesn't immediately see a difference, but he does, so she's going to try to find it. "That must take a lot of extra training and skill?"
Is that it? She hopes that's it. If he flies as well as he plays darts, he must be the best pilot in the galaxy. That's her take on the sitch, anyway. Still, she's glad he's out. She thinks he must be safer that way.
"Mm." His hand is thanked for the lovely touch with nuzzling. She'll nuzzle and nose his hand until she can kiss the back of it. "So young. I would have thought you'd need to be older to be a captain."
Her lips move next to kiss his palm. He might worry it's too rough for her, but she has no such concerns. "I don't think I can answer any better either way, but did you mean how many springs have their been, or how old I was before I became this?"
no subject
Date: 2016-08-10 11:20 pm (UTC)"Well, yeah, that." He says with his lips twisting into a cocky smile. "I also don't want Brienne to think I'll be any kind of challenge for her in hand to hand combat. That's not the kind of military training I got."
He feels older than the years he's lived and she appears young to him. If he had to guess her age on her physical looks, he'd say about a decade younger than him. "You can vault yourself right up through the ranks where I come from when you own your own ship. That's not to say a captain and the person who own a ship are always the same, but a lot of times they are."
When it comes to her age, Han would be content not to talk about it anymore. The truth was, he was trying to see if telling him about her age would parlay into a conversation about a life before the one she lives now. One only hinted at before.
"If I had what you said before right ... and I only get so much of this magic stuff so maybe I'm not, I thought you said it was your first spring as the Queen."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-11 03:47 am (UTC)Spring is a youthful time of year. It would make sense for its avatar to appear to be young, wouldn't it? She certainly acts the age. That might be part of why his maturity is so intriguing to her. Opposites attract.
"It is. I was human before, but I don't remember much about my life then. I was old enough, if that's what you're worried about." There's some wistfulness in her tone, but not really sorrow. Whatever she's given up, she doesn't remember enough about it to miss it.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-11 03:44 pm (UTC)"I can't tell if you're the kind of woman who'd appreciate a display of dominance or not." You have to admit it is natural for alphas to behave as such and hell, sometimes those wild displays are impressive. "But, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want to see it from two of the people you care about."
From the moment he first realized he liked Frea as much as he did, he realized it was because she was so different than him. It would make sense that he would find her rare and special considering the kind of people he does tend to hang around with. And Solo finds himself liking pretty much all of her traits as far as he can tell, but if he had to narrow it down to one thing, it would be her optimism. He finds it oddly reassuring coming from Frea where the same sentiments coming from someone else might make him roll his eyes or sneer.
He's not all that sure why that is. Han only knows that he's happy that it turned out that way.
"Maybe it's better that you don't remember all that much." He says after a moment of thought. "I feel like if it was me, I wouldn't want to."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-11 07:24 pm (UTC)"It depends on the display," she admits. His showing off at darts appealed. The idea of him and Brienne fighting, though... there's no mistaking that face she makes. No. She would not like that at all. "You two are really different people, but that doesn't mean you couldn't be friends if you wanted."
Subtle, isn't she? But she's not going to push. His forehead gets another kiss before she shifts slightly beneath him, resettling and adjusting how the blanket's tucked around her. Just the getting-comfy kinds of things people do when they're at ease in a situation.
"Yeah, you're probably right." It's easy to agree since she feels the same way. "And lots of people wish for brand new starts in life, right? I sure got that. And I found you so I must be doing a pretty good job with it."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-12 12:35 am (UTC)"Everything okay over there?" He has a bit of a lazy smile on his lips at the question. Not that the shuffling particularly strikes him as odd, but sometimes it's good to check in. And he's kind of the host here, isn't he? "If you're thirsty I can get up."
He might be wondering more about her life than she is right now. Not having any detail means she could have had a beautiful and amazing life before this one that she was cheated out of or perhaps she came from some kind of background that was unkind and lonely. Unless the memories come back with time, there was no way to know.
"I think there was a time where, if someone gave me a chance to have another life, I would have taken it." He purses his lips for a moment before adding. "It was nice that I met you when I did. I guess like everyone else, I was ready for spring and then ... there you were. But you're more than just spring to me. You know that, right?"
no subject
Date: 2016-08-12 04:46 am (UTC)"Mm-hmm." She gives him a reassuring smile. "A little thirsty, but too comfy to want to let you up yet." He is absolutely the host. This is his home, after all. She'll try to be a low-maintenance guest.
Time will tell, literally. Whatever and wherever she came from, she chose this new life. For her, for now, that's (mostly) enough.
She'd been preparing to tease him gently about wanting a different life, and maybe to ask what kind he would have wanted. Like she's some kind of genie who can grant wishes. (Well, he does certainly rub her in all the right ways...) But then that assertion, and she can't turn her head fast enough to hide her startled expression. No, she didn't know that. She could try to pass it off, pointing out that she gets the whole summer too, but they both know that's not what he meant.
When she does finally look down, it's with cheeks flushed with confusion and pleasure. "I um. Thank you."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-12 01:04 pm (UTC)In turn, he's a little surprised with the way that she reacts to the words, but Han of all people is familiar with the way that certain sentiments are powerful. He knows that there are things that people can say to him that bring out a very similar reaction. Touched a nerve. Rather than watch the wave of emotion she might be feeling, he casts his eyes away for a few seconds; letting his presence be felt not from the weight of a stare, but with with a thumb dragging very lightly over her cheek.
"Sure." He murmurs. "Just figured you should know."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-12 09:18 pm (UTC)It's a nerve she didn't know she had. (Anyone getting the impression she doesn't spend a lot of time in self-contemplation would be correct.) It's a little odd, to have him point that out, like it's easy and obvious. Like she should know these things because they're part of the natural order. There's a flicker of a frown when he looks away because it makes her think she's done something wrong. The touch is reassuring on a number of levels and she leans into it.
"That was kind." When her blush starts to fade she reaches over to turn his face toward her again so she can kiss him. It's a soft kiss but a rich one, full of the things she's discovering she feels for him beyond passion. "Thank you."
no subject
Date: 2016-08-13 10:43 pm (UTC)But that will be a concern for then.
For now, he's happy. It's hard not to be when he feels able to say something heartfelt to someone and have it be moving. And kissed like he's being kissed right now, besides.
"You'd have said as much to me if things were the other way around."
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From: